bursting with life

The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away, and I must remember to praise Him always for both.

We've been given another baby. I'm not even five weeks along, and, according to the internet, baby is the size of a poppy seed, which is so tiny it's ridiculous.

Honestly, I can not believe that something that small can affect my body so much. I went to see Avengers: Age of Ultron (twice, it was that good) and had to leave the theatre THREE times to use the bathroom. Three. I was that girl, crawling over the stranger every thirty minutes. I'm normally a bladder of steel, but these days, not so much. Also, as soon as I'm pregnant my legs start itching. It's super strange, and because suddenly I have AMAZING long, strong fingernails, but I forget, I scratch my legs when they itch and then I'm like, "Ow. What's with these beautiful fingernails that are scraping away all my flesh??" Outside of pregnancy my fingernails are brittle and weak, even when I'm taking prenatals, but four weeks of added hormones and BAM fingernails that look so much like my mother's, I could stare at them all the days.

My mother bought me those three tiny rings for mother's day "C.V.N.", which stands for Christian Vir Nowak, the name of our first son.

People like to ask, so I'll go ahead and tell you. I think this baby is a girl. But I thought it was a girl last time and it was a boy, so my baby radar has been off 100% of the time so far. In some ways, I think it would be easier to have a girl. I'd be able to put away all of Christian's things for awhile and fill the nursery with pretty new things, but on the other hand I want badly for Matt to have a son to teach the manly things to, and for me to stare at and call handsome.

Both hopefully eventually, but not, Lord willing, at the same time.

People keep making twin jokes, and I'll let you know when they start being funny.

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